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  • Writer's pictureAmber Howard

Grounding Relationships in Authenticity: Embracing Gifts and Acknowledging Lacks

As I journey through life, I've come to realize the incredible importance of being proud of and embracing our unique gifts, while also acknowledging and honoring our lacks. It's a delicate balance that allows us to be our most authentic selves, a concept that has been beautifully put forth by my coach Chris Saade. To "create yourself in congruence with your genuine personality, the true powers of your nature, and your passionate desires" is not just an idea, but a profound way of living. Let me share my thoughts and experiences on why this is so significant.


Throughout my life, like many others, I have often felt the pressure to provide something to others that didn't truly belong to me. We live in a world where societal norms and external expectations often influence us to conform to certain roles or behaviors. These expectations can lead us to wear masks, suppressing our true selves in the process. In doing so, we lose touch with our authenticity and the unique combination of gifts and lacks that make us who we are.


In Chris Saade's words, we are encouraged to "sculpt the elements that nature gave us – singular traits, gifts, and lacks – and make out of them an expression of beauty, maturity, love, and service." This powerful insight invites us to appreciate the individuality that defines each of us. Our gifts are the facets of ourselves that shine brightly, the things we excel at and bring joy to our lives. Embracing these gifts can empower us to create a life that aligns with our true purpose.


However, it's equally important to honor our lacks. Our lacks are not weaknesses but qualities or aspects of being human that aren't natural to us. They are parts of us that need acknowledgment, and acceptance. By recognizing our lacks, we can accept our whole selves without feeling inadequate or inauthentic. This self-awareness is essential for personal development and self-acceptance.


The impact of embracing our gifts and acknowledging our lacks is profound. When we allow ourselves to be authentic, we radiate a sense of genuineness that attracts like-minded individuals into our lives. Authenticity fosters deeper connections, as people can sense our sincerity and vulnerability. It's a catalyst for forming meaningful relationships built on trust and mutual understanding.


Moreover, by embracing our gifts and acknowledging our lacks, we free ourselves from the burden of trying to be someone we're not. We no longer feel compelled to put on a facade to meet others' expectations. This liberation allows us to focus on personal growth, harnessing our unique strengths while working on areas that need improvement.


In my own journey towards authenticity, I have found that the intuition of my heart has been a guiding force. It's that inner voice that reminds me of my true nature and urges me to live in alignment with it. This inner wisdom helps me discern what is genuine and what isn't, allowing me to make choices that are congruent with my authentic self.


But here's the beautiful twist: for any relationship to flourish, all we need is to ask others to give us more of their gifts, the things they naturally and joyfully want to give. This reciprocity creates a powerful dynamic of mutual support and understanding. It's a reminder that authenticity is a two-way street; by encouraging others to embrace their gifts, we also strengthen our bonds and enrich our connections.


Action Step: To foster flourishing relationships, start by getting to know your own gifts and lacks. Take some time for introspection and self-discovery. What are your unique talents and strengths? What areas do you feel less confident in? Once you have a better understanding of yourself, extend the same curiosity to those around you. Seek to uncover their gifts and lacks, and encourage them to share more of what comes naturally to them. This mutual exchange of authenticity will create a foundation for deeper, more meaningful connections.


In conclusion, embracing our gifts and honoring our lacks is not just about self-acceptance; it's about creating a life that reflects our true essence. Authenticity becomes the cornerstone of flourishing relationships, where we encourage each other to be our best, most authentic selves. It's a journey well worth taking, for it leads us to our most authentic selves, where we find true fulfillment and purpose, not only for ourselves but in the company of those we cherish.

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